I want to share with you the reason why I sing about my life. Especially when I have been hit with so many curve balls and downright body slams. I feel like Rocky Balboa as he was pummeled by Apollo Creed and Clubber Lang. One wondered why he kept getting up when he was punched into the ring’s floor. In the first Rocky movie, the commentator said at the end of the movie, “What is keeping him up, I don’t know.” I have been hearing those words resonating in my ears since I was a child and first saw that movie. Because it is a parallel to my own life. I have been punched and punched and punched. I have been knocked down. But I have continued to get back up. And every time I have, I have rehearsed those words in my ears. “What is keeping her up, I don’t know.” For, even I have not known at times what had kept me up when life had been intent upon destroying me. I can tell you now that it was the power of God working on my behalf. He just wasn’t showing Himself at those times in my life.
I was bullied whilst growing up. My childhood years were sheer torture, for I had the children at school tormenting me, and then I had the horror of child abuse waiting upon me when I got home. There was no one to save me. No one to come to my rescue. No one responded to the screams coming from my house. And I was a fragile creature. I took all of the abuse, believing for a long time that I deserved it. So, I accepted it. Until one day I decided that I was worthy of more than exploitation and debasement. And I began to fight back. Of course, I had continued to keep right on getting up whenever knocked down. But in addition to that, I started to swing back at the forces that assailed me on an almost daily basis.
I used to wonder why I was constantly assaulted by life. I was laughed at and mocked. I was not beautiful, so I was teased because of my looks. (I used to walk around with my head down, not looking into the eyes of people because I did not want to see the looks of disgust on their faces.) However, one day, I told myself that I was beautiful. That other people’s opinions did not have a deciding factor on who I decided I was going to be. I began to walk with a swagger in my hips. I looked in the mirror and told myself that I was pretty. And I stopped taking the slaps that life constantly incurred against me and started swinging back.
I sing today because I am more than a conqueror, just as the word of God says I am. I sing because I am a breathtakingly beautiful woman. Not because I have the looks of a super model. But because I have a beautiful heart. And a spectacular personality. All of the poundings that I have taken over the years have made me into the person that I am and that person is fantastic. I care about people. I put others first. God is the most important person and thing in my life.
I could care less about things. I have lost my most precious worldly possessions three separate times in my life, so I do not have an attachment to stuff. I care more about the souls that inhabit this world. I pray for them. I pray for YOU.
See me as I sing. A song of victory. A love song. The song of a fighter. And that’s what I am. A fighter. So I say to life, “Bring it on! I’ve got something for you!”
I am Cassie. Hear me roar.
Blessed be the Name of the Lord.